Eid Is Nothing But My Friend

I miss Abdalwahab.

He used to be the only colorful thing in my grey days. and this Eid I felt his absence, not constantly, but every time your heart tries and search / looking for something familiar and finds nothing there. I was surrounded by people and I’m, and none of it touched the specific place he occupies. that is what frightens me about this kind of missing. it isn’t general loneliness. it is targeted, I can’t search for something, the ache for a particular person that no number of other people can fill the space the left, because they are not a type, they are a person, and there is only one of them.

I can’t think that even if I had known the entire world, anyone would bring back what I feel with him. my days are woven with him. my childhood, my memories, my brightest memories live somewhere near him. and no matter where I turn, I find myself longing for my friend, his presence, the specific color he gave to ordinary days, the version of me that existed easily when he was around.